Jaded
by rainingWolf
Summary: From a muse grows a thought that spirals into a deeper understanding of the Mord'Sith he was travelling with. One fireside chat was all it took for Zedd to realize that Cara may youngest of them all, no matter how jaded her eyes become.


**Title:** Jaded  
**Character(s):** Cara, Zedd  
**Pairing(s):** None  
**Summary:** From a muse grows a thought that spirals into a deeper understanding of the Mord'Sith he was travelling with. One fireside chat was all it took for Zedd to realize that Cara may be the oldest and wisest of them all. And that's what makes her the youngest; what a jaded path she walks.  
**Warning(s):** None  
**Disclaimer:** I am a poor college student. I don't own anything.

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Zedd felt old, weary beyond his age, as he sat against the tree, peering through the fire's shadow to observe his slumbering companions.

He had been thinking for a while now in the darkness of the night. He had been unable to fall asleep, being jerked to wakefulness at every little sound, and as he leaned back against the tree truck, the bite of the bark barely registering in his mind, he reckons if this is what a family is like.

He was the grandfather of their merry band, both figuratively and literally.

His eyes lingered on the sleeping duo near the fire side. Even in their sleep, the Seeker and Mother Confessor still seem to reach out to each other. Richard was sleeping, Kahlan by his side, their hands just barely touching as their breathing evened out and matched each others.

The old man gave a huff as he indulged in memories of his grandson's strength and courage. A chuckle threatened to escape his mouth and he clamped it down, not wanting to wake the duo up. Richard was just like a father, willing to sacrifice anything for the ones he love, he mused, and Kahlan was the mother, her gentle nature appealing to all. They complimented each other, each staving the other's temptation away and each blossoming under the other's care.

Zedd gave a little sigh as he watched the two. _Such a tragic pair of lovers, _he thinks as he shifts his posture and his eyes wander around the campsite for his third companion.

Cara. He could never place her in his world. She didn't fit as neatly as the others in the little family scenario he had thought up.

She had always been the enemy. The one in red leather that was more the colour of blood than anything else. The one with the piercing thousand-yard stare with brilliant azure eyes and hair the colour of the yellow wheat field.

Richard was the one who accepted her first with open arms and over time, Kahlan also loosened her guard around the Mord'Sith as well, the two women sometimes lingering behind the group. When questioned on what they were whispering about, Cara insisted that they were discussing battle tactics in a monotone voice before stalking away towards 'Lord Rahl' at a seemingly fast pace. Kahlan, on the other hand, would just chuckle quietly whenever this happened and just wink at Zedd, going 'it's a girl thing.'

This always made Zedd's bushy eyebrows shoot up because he had never truly considered Cara a girl. She was just Cara, the Mord'Sith, the ever present self proclaimed bodyguard of Richard. She was always the earliest to rise and she was always the last one to go to sleep, always insisting on 'Lord Rahl' to get proper rest. She would then begrudgingly say in the same breath that he was a glutton for sleep which Richard would respond that he could take night watch. The blonde would promptly shot down his help with a perfectly arched eyebrow and her chin would tilt upwards in defiance.

Jolted from his thoughts, Zedd suppressed a gasp that threatened to rip out of his throat when he saw cerulean eyes staring back at him over the sparks that were leaping out of the fire.

A prim voice crossed the clearing to hit his ears. "What is it, Wizard? The ground not soft enough for your magical self to lie upon?" The way the word magical lilted off her tongue was the same way the word banelings or screelings came out; in a malicious somewhat gleeful tone that sent shivers down Zedd's back.

"No. I couldn't sleep."

Cara blinked lazily at his answer, her eyes narrowing slightly as if she did not truly believe his response was the truth. A huff escaped her lips before her bright blue eyes went back to darting around their campsite, seeking out any malevolent enemy that dared to attack Lord Rahl and the Mother Confessor in their sleep.

Silence filled the air as Cara's gaze wandered from her observation of the clearing back towards him, her look suspicious.

He coughed, a little unnerved by her stare, and his mind groped around for a topic to talk about.

"Tell me about your family, Cara."

The look on her face would have made him laugh out loud if not for the fact he was full expecting an agiel to be poked in his side; she had an incredulous expression and her mouth parted open a little as she stared at him, her eyes hooded.

A strained voice answered him back. "My family?"

Her eyes narrowed again as if she thought he was joking around and her knuckles turned a pearly white; her gloves were off for the night.

Putting himself out on a limb, Zedd got up with a grunt and made his way to Cara's side. She watched him amble his way over, saying nothing, but he thought that the angle of her head now said all she needed to. As he settled down onto the spot next to her, she shifted back, as if he was encroaching on her personal space.

He chanced again. "Yes. Your family."

A snort exploded from Cara, mirth crinkling her eyes up, making her look younger if not for the fact that he caught the deadly undertone of her laugh. "My family?" She tipped her head to the side as her gaze slide up to Zedd's face. "What do you want to know about my _family_?"

He said nothing, letting the silence nudge her into talking and he was rewarded when Cara's lips thinned and her eyes flirted towards the fire. "You already know everything, Wizard. Why bother asking?"

"I know that your father gave his life for you. I know your mother died when you and your father got captured by the Mord'Sith. I know your sister is alive and well and her children are beautiful and her husband is handsome. But that tells me nothing."

Cara's nose wrinkled at his response. "That tells you everything, Wizard. What more do you want to know?"

A hefty sigh came from Zedd. "Why don't you tell me about your childhood? I'm sure you have at least one childhood memory you cherish."

If possible, her eyes narrowed even more as she leaned back away from him. "And why do you think I would tell you anything?"

And that's when it hit Zedd, hit him so hard that he almost doubled over with the weight of it. The way Cara held herself, the look on her face when he had inquired about her family, the way she arched away from all contact even after months of traveling with them as if unsure on how to react when Richard clasped his hand on her shoulder or when Kahlan went in for a hug. She would freeze and quickly brush them off, saying loudly that they didn't have time for such silly antics and that they could've been halfway across the Midlands by now if not for their frivolous behaviour. Whenever she said that, the two lovebirds would just smile and shake their head as if to say 'let it be.'

But now, as Cara stared at him with a questioning authority in her eyes and her head tilted with a hint of aggression in the motion, he realized that maybe, just maybe, Cara does fit into his little family tree. She might not have the kindheartedness of Richard or the gentleness of Kahlan but she was still willing to take care of them. She had steel and power and underneath it all, steadfast loyalty and blood hot anger. She was always so self-contained, Cara. He'd never thought her lonely, just alone. Perhaps he'd been wrong about that.

After all, there's a difference between being lonely and being alone.

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Reviews are much appreciated.


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